The random witterings of Jonathan Morris, writer.

Thursday, 30 April 2009

Nothing Compares 2 U

I suppose we must be in a recession now (curse you Tony Blairs!) because the only stuff which seems to be being advertised now is car insurance. It’s the spirit of the age. People don’t just want cheaper car insurance. They want to compare different car insurance companies to get the best deal on their car insurance.

Christ it’s a dull subject. So what do the advertisers do? Well, you’ve still got direct line, the perky talking telephone on wheels, now voiced by the Pocoyo and Harry Potter guy and Paul Merton (who, let’s face it, doesn’t get a lot of voice-over work for a reason). And you’ve still got Admiral Insurance, though sadly no longer played by Andy from EastEnders. Do you remember Andy from EastEnders? I do. And there’s still Churchill the dog. Not sure if he’s still being voiced by Vic Reeves.

But I don’t just want car insurance, I want to compare car insurances! What should I do? Well apparently I should enter a white void, like that bit in The Matrix where Keanu is choosing his weapons, and compare my car insurances that way. Because, let’s face it, it is exactly like The Matrix.

Or you can have an advert full of ‘real people’ talking as though on home videos, which basically means hired actors but made up to have slightly bushier eyebrows and pallid complexions because that’s what real people look like.

Or – and this is genius – you can advertise your insurance comparison site with a talking computer-generated Russian meerkat. I don’t have a car, so I don’t need car insurance, but I love this advert so much I’m tempted to get one. It may even rival the ‘One step at a time, Martin!’ advert in my affections. And check out the website.

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